actually, nah. he probably looked like this:
Monday, November 5, 2007
Sunday, November 4, 2007
The Annals of the Great Warrior Wu Zhun
Amongst the assorted DVDs, old toothbrushes, used bongs, powerful ancient relics and newspapers strewn across the MB-1 storage room floor lies an ancient compendium of knowledge. A powerful tome once thought lost to civilization, only to be ingeniously recovered by the imagination of a single being. It is an ancient log of the world's first Zombie Invasion, a journal filled with trials and tribulations, hopes and fears, women and wine, song and dance, swords and spears, owls and donkeys and yeah, zombies too.
We have worked very hard to repair the age-worn parchment, utilizing the tried and true combination of word processors and boredom, in order to present to our readers the story of one man.
And now, for the first time ever, his life will finally be brought to light after 4 millennia of darkness and desolation.
50% Man, 30% Warrior, 15% Chinese Guy, 4% Anarchist, 1% Bald and 152.67% Muscle.
He is.
Wu Zhun.
This is his story.
First entry will be uploaded after I remember that Retinol is used in the synthesis of Rhodopsin which is the pigment in the rod-cells of the eye which are responsible for black and white vision in dim light.
Zombloke Two
Option A
Option G
11 Days
We have worked very hard to repair the age-worn parchment, utilizing the tried and true combination of word processors and boredom, in order to present to our readers the story of one man.
And now, for the first time ever, his life will finally be brought to light after 4 millennia of darkness and desolation.
50% Man, 30% Warrior, 15% Chinese Guy, 4% Anarchist, 1% Bald and 152.67% Muscle.
He is.
Wu Zhun.
This is his story.
First entry will be uploaded after I remember that Retinol is used in the synthesis of Rhodopsin which is the pigment in the rod-cells of the eye which are responsible for black and white vision in dim light.
Zombloke Two
Option A
Option G
11 Days
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Diary of a PARANOID MAN VI: *IMPORTANT* I Saw A Zombie Yesterday
T'was around the twenty-first hour when I first saw the foul spawn of hell.
However, where a normal man might quail in fear and die or react with stupid disbelief and die, I did not do either. Instead, instinct and training kicked in. Executing a zero-point turn, I wheeled about and split, making a beeline for the trusty metal pole I always leave lying in an obscure corner.
Grabbing it and feeling the supreme power that only a five-foot metal pole can give, I performed several dexterous twirls with my weapon before sending a crushing overhead strike onto the skull of my zombie foe.
It collapsed and I scrambled forth to investigate. Had the zombie invasion truly begun? Was there still time to save civilization before all was lost? Should I take a ride down to Burger King to eat my last Double Whopper with Cheese before life as I know it ends?
Upon closer inspection, I figured the zombie was about 4 feet, roughly 120 cm. I felt it quite odd and was about to investigate further when I detected sudden movement through my peripheral vision. Jerking my head up, I was astonished to see several more of those evil four foot zombies with pale-looking adults.
OH SNAP! I'M SURROUNDED! Watching as my foes closed in around me, I noted the shocked looks on the 'adult' zombies, they obviously were the first victims of those evil short-statured bastards. Their deaths had to be avenged.
Letting my honed combat skills settle in, I leapt into the fray, crying bloody murder as I smashed downwards, taking one of the small zombies down in an instant, splattering brains all over the sidewalk. Using the back end of my staff, I jabbed backwards, impaling one of the adults through his gut and into his spine. The jarring grind of bone on metal almost caused me to drop my pole but I held fast, determined to make it out of this disaster, or die trying.
At this point the zombies suddenly began to turn and flee. Judging by the speed at which they moved, I quickly concluded that these were physically-enhanced zombies similar to those in Dawn of the Dead. It also appeared to me that they must have detected the scent of weak flesh in the distance and were obviously moving to devour it. This would not do!
Shouting Honour and Glory to the great AAS, I surged after them, lashing out with my staff and knocking two more zombies to the ground. A quick stab through the skull finished them off as I continued my chase.
In a matter of five minutes it was over. The zombies were defeated, lying dead and broken all over the blood-stained street. I walked over to one of the four-foot zombies lying on the ground, his neck dangling at an awkward angle. Bending down, I stared into the cold dead eyes of my enemy. Noting some discolouration with his skin, I rubbed at the blemish, only to pull away tacky face-paint...
Oops.
Zombloke II
Lying low for the next few days
Has plans to skip town
Happy Halloween!!
However, where a normal man might quail in fear and die or react with stupid disbelief and die, I did not do either. Instead, instinct and training kicked in. Executing a zero-point turn, I wheeled about and split, making a beeline for the trusty metal pole I always leave lying in an obscure corner.
Grabbing it and feeling the supreme power that only a five-foot metal pole can give, I performed several dexterous twirls with my weapon before sending a crushing overhead strike onto the skull of my zombie foe.
It collapsed and I scrambled forth to investigate. Had the zombie invasion truly begun? Was there still time to save civilization before all was lost? Should I take a ride down to Burger King to eat my last Double Whopper with Cheese before life as I know it ends?
Upon closer inspection, I figured the zombie was about 4 feet, roughly 120 cm. I felt it quite odd and was about to investigate further when I detected sudden movement through my peripheral vision. Jerking my head up, I was astonished to see several more of those evil four foot zombies with pale-looking adults.
OH SNAP! I'M SURROUNDED! Watching as my foes closed in around me, I noted the shocked looks on the 'adult' zombies, they obviously were the first victims of those evil short-statured bastards. Their deaths had to be avenged.
Letting my honed combat skills settle in, I leapt into the fray, crying bloody murder as I smashed downwards, taking one of the small zombies down in an instant, splattering brains all over the sidewalk. Using the back end of my staff, I jabbed backwards, impaling one of the adults through his gut and into his spine. The jarring grind of bone on metal almost caused me to drop my pole but I held fast, determined to make it out of this disaster, or die trying.
At this point the zombies suddenly began to turn and flee. Judging by the speed at which they moved, I quickly concluded that these were physically-enhanced zombies similar to those in Dawn of the Dead. It also appeared to me that they must have detected the scent of weak flesh in the distance and were obviously moving to devour it. This would not do!
Shouting Honour and Glory to the great AAS, I surged after them, lashing out with my staff and knocking two more zombies to the ground. A quick stab through the skull finished them off as I continued my chase.
In a matter of five minutes it was over. The zombies were defeated, lying dead and broken all over the blood-stained street. I walked over to one of the four-foot zombies lying on the ground, his neck dangling at an awkward angle. Bending down, I stared into the cold dead eyes of my enemy. Noting some discolouration with his skin, I rubbed at the blemish, only to pull away tacky face-paint...
Oops.
Zombloke II
Lying low for the next few days
Has plans to skip town
Happy Halloween!!
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
The Point of Salvation
Some here at MB-1 feel that my post today is quite out of place for several reasons. One, it is an uncharacteristically happy post, which I don't find odd at all. Two, such news should only be revealed if and when a zombie invasion occurs as a form of moral booster. Bollocks, I say, it's best to educate the masses about potential 'free zones' before the zombies arrive so we can at least attempt a getaway!
This theory stems from several zombie flicks, most notable of which would be either Land of the Dead by Herr Romero or the Milla Jovovich show, a.k.a. Resident Evil. In both movies, several characters attempt to travel to Alaska upon hearing rumours that the Zombie Invasion has yet to spread to said location. The point here I guess is that due to the fact that Alaska is a freezing hellhole, something about it impairs or prevents the zombies or the zombie spreading virus from encroaching on their lands.
Let's first examine some possible factors and determine which one is the most plausible.
1) The treacherous terrain of Alaska impedes the progress of Zombies. The terrain of Alaska is largely permafrost. Usually it provides a solid enough surface to traverse across but due to global warming much of that once passable terrain is now a boggy mush pretty much all year round.
Hence, thanks to the blessing that is the greenhouse effect, Alaska is well fortified by the wetlands that surround it which could impede wandering zombies.
However, this physical barrier is hardly enough to hold back a zombie spreading virus, a la 28 days later, or zombie vermin/carrion/animals that could possibly circumnavigate the treacherous swamps. Furthermore, there is still plenty of good solid ground where zombies could cross thereby unleashing their reign of terror on the populace.
Probability Meter: 15%
2) Alaska boasts 34000 miles of tidal shoreline due to it having many islands. Islands are relatively safe havens in a zombie invasion. If spruced up and made self-sustaining, it's basically your paradise where you can hide away while the world collapses upon itself.
With some basic necessities such as fuel, food, agricultural implements and so on, one could conceivably create an island fort. Of course, do thoroughly scour the island for zombies and do make sure you have enough space to sustain yourself and the other people you've managed to liberate from the perils of the mainland.
The chances of zombies actually getting to your island is pretty low once you've established yourself. Unless they're the type straight out of Land of the Dead, then I figure they're probably not intelligent enough to realize they don't need to breathe and thus decide to take a stroll down to your little island fort. Lucky for you, they may or may not get pulverized by the pressure of the deep sea but if they don't, well, many sleepless nights abound then.
Probability Meter: 45%
3) The Natives. It is unknown to many, myself included, but it has been said that the Inuits were once great warriors who battled fiercely against the undead legions of long ago. Whilst there is no historical data supporting such a cataclysmic event occurring in the past, legend has it that the Inuits waged a bloody and terrible war across the raging waters of the Arctic Seas, fighting tooth and nail to save humanity from the zombie menace.
Following the defeat of the zombie hordes, the Inuits retreated to a safe haven near the roof of the world, swearing to preserve their warrior spirit and to once again rise up and defend the world should such a disaster present itself. They might not have 52 words for 'Snow' but they have definitely have 52 words for balls in my book.
If this is true, then perhaps it is wise to seek refuge in the frigid lands of the Inuit. However, it's most like bull.
Probability Meter: 0.0001% (Although it would be shit awesome if it did happen.)
4) The Cold. Ah, the mighty powers wielded by Old Man Winter are a force to be reckoned with indeed. The sub-zero temperatures of Alaska are more than capable of stopping both men and machine alike in their tracks. But how will it fare against the legions of Undeath? Let's find out!
Zombies are basically reanimated corpses and are therefore physically human. Hence, it can be inferred that their bodies suffer the same punishment from the elements that we do. The weather of the Alaskan Tundra is extremely harsh even during the best of times. Frostbite and other frost related ailments are often suffered by the uninitiated members of the populace. Although zombies do not suffer from hypothermia, they might lose an arm or a leg attempting the treacherous hike North.
Hence it is possible for the chill of winter to literally freeze a horde of zombies in their tracks. Most zombies are usually clad in little more than the clothes their former selves died in, attire that is utterly unfit for arctic travels. So, yes, the chill of winter is a plausible method of deterring a zombie invasion into Alaska.
What about viruses or other forms of airborne pathogens? Well, it is likely that the cold could inhibit the propagation of the virus and may even kill it outright. It certainly is a heartening thought.
Probability Factor: 82% (Coincidentally, it achieves a Grade 7.)
Since the climate ultimately affects the sustainability of Alaska in a zombie invasion, one can draw several links to other states much closer to home. Siberia for instance, or perhaps the Northernmost fjords of Norway, or Greenland. As long as its freezing all year round, it should be safe from the zombie menace. However, establishing a compound that can sustain you for quite some time is going to be difficult and it is currently being researched by our MB-1 team during their free time. (Hah.)
Of course, people might also say that the whole allusion to Alaska was Hollywood's attempt at acknowledging the adopted kid in the family, but hey, they probably voted that they would commit suicide in the face of a zombie invasion so who needs them eh?
That's all for now.
Coming to you live from MB-1, this is Derrick Wolfgang Peterson II saying bah-bye.
Zombloke II
2nd
15th
Party Hard
This theory stems from several zombie flicks, most notable of which would be either Land of the Dead by Herr Romero or the Milla Jovovich show, a.k.a. Resident Evil. In both movies, several characters attempt to travel to Alaska upon hearing rumours that the Zombie Invasion has yet to spread to said location. The point here I guess is that due to the fact that Alaska is a freezing hellhole, something about it impairs or prevents the zombies or the zombie spreading virus from encroaching on their lands.
Let's first examine some possible factors and determine which one is the most plausible.
1) The treacherous terrain of Alaska impedes the progress of Zombies. The terrain of Alaska is largely permafrost. Usually it provides a solid enough surface to traverse across but due to global warming much of that once passable terrain is now a boggy mush pretty much all year round.
Hence, thanks to the blessing that is the greenhouse effect, Alaska is well fortified by the wetlands that surround it which could impede wandering zombies.
However, this physical barrier is hardly enough to hold back a zombie spreading virus, a la 28 days later, or zombie vermin/carrion/animals that could possibly circumnavigate the treacherous swamps. Furthermore, there is still plenty of good solid ground where zombies could cross thereby unleashing their reign of terror on the populace.
Probability Meter: 15%
2) Alaska boasts 34000 miles of tidal shoreline due to it having many islands. Islands are relatively safe havens in a zombie invasion. If spruced up and made self-sustaining, it's basically your paradise where you can hide away while the world collapses upon itself.
With some basic necessities such as fuel, food, agricultural implements and so on, one could conceivably create an island fort. Of course, do thoroughly scour the island for zombies and do make sure you have enough space to sustain yourself and the other people you've managed to liberate from the perils of the mainland.
The chances of zombies actually getting to your island is pretty low once you've established yourself. Unless they're the type straight out of Land of the Dead, then I figure they're probably not intelligent enough to realize they don't need to breathe and thus decide to take a stroll down to your little island fort. Lucky for you, they may or may not get pulverized by the pressure of the deep sea but if they don't, well, many sleepless nights abound then.
Probability Meter: 45%
3) The Natives. It is unknown to many, myself included, but it has been said that the Inuits were once great warriors who battled fiercely against the undead legions of long ago. Whilst there is no historical data supporting such a cataclysmic event occurring in the past, legend has it that the Inuits waged a bloody and terrible war across the raging waters of the Arctic Seas, fighting tooth and nail to save humanity from the zombie menace.
Following the defeat of the zombie hordes, the Inuits retreated to a safe haven near the roof of the world, swearing to preserve their warrior spirit and to once again rise up and defend the world should such a disaster present itself. They might not have 52 words for 'Snow' but they have definitely have 52 words for balls in my book.
If this is true, then perhaps it is wise to seek refuge in the frigid lands of the Inuit. However, it's most like bull.
Probability Meter: 0.0001% (Although it would be shit awesome if it did happen.)
4) The Cold. Ah, the mighty powers wielded by Old Man Winter are a force to be reckoned with indeed. The sub-zero temperatures of Alaska are more than capable of stopping both men and machine alike in their tracks. But how will it fare against the legions of Undeath? Let's find out!
Zombies are basically reanimated corpses and are therefore physically human. Hence, it can be inferred that their bodies suffer the same punishment from the elements that we do. The weather of the Alaskan Tundra is extremely harsh even during the best of times. Frostbite and other frost related ailments are often suffered by the uninitiated members of the populace. Although zombies do not suffer from hypothermia, they might lose an arm or a leg attempting the treacherous hike North.
Hence it is possible for the chill of winter to literally freeze a horde of zombies in their tracks. Most zombies are usually clad in little more than the clothes their former selves died in, attire that is utterly unfit for arctic travels. So, yes, the chill of winter is a plausible method of deterring a zombie invasion into Alaska.
What about viruses or other forms of airborne pathogens? Well, it is likely that the cold could inhibit the propagation of the virus and may even kill it outright. It certainly is a heartening thought.
Probability Factor: 82% (Coincidentally, it achieves a Grade 7.)
Since the climate ultimately affects the sustainability of Alaska in a zombie invasion, one can draw several links to other states much closer to home. Siberia for instance, or perhaps the Northernmost fjords of Norway, or Greenland. As long as its freezing all year round, it should be safe from the zombie menace. However, establishing a compound that can sustain you for quite some time is going to be difficult and it is currently being researched by our MB-1 team during their free time. (Hah.)
Of course, people might also say that the whole allusion to Alaska was Hollywood's attempt at acknowledging the adopted kid in the family, but hey, they probably voted that they would commit suicide in the face of a zombie invasion so who needs them eh?
That's all for now.
Coming to you live from MB-1, this is Derrick Wolfgang Peterson II saying bah-bye.
Zombloke II
2nd
15th
Party Hard
Other sources of interest
http://www.cracked.com/article_15643_5-scientific-reasons-zombie-apocalypse-could-actually-happen.html
(Linked by Kentay. Zomg Biblio guys!)
Interesting article.
End.
(Linked by Kentay. Zomg Biblio guys!)
Interesting article.
End.
Monday, October 29, 2007
A Reluctant Change Of Perspective
Hello again. Yes it's still Zombloke II bringing you another wholesome update in preparing for the imminent zombie invasion.
Today I'll be revising my previous stance on mugging. No, I still refuse to believe that it does not cause zombification but then again, 500 tests on starving children have yet to prove me right. Fret not, my zeal is not quenched and if I have to process all of Singapore's youth than by the gods I shall.
Anyway, in accordance with MB-1 policy regarding 'a lack of things to write about', I shall now attempt to draft a new set of tips to help you would-be-zombi--, I mean students wholly devoted to the excellence of your end-year results.
Ok, as mentioned before the most likely place you could be studying in would be a room. A nice quant four-walled enclave in which you can mercilessly pour over pages and pages of text. If you're studying in the open, well, a whole different set of rules apply.
First off! Tips and tricks on how to stay alive in a zombie invasion while studying in an enclosed area.
#1) Always study facing the door. Most needless zombie deaths could usually be avoided as long as the character takes some simple precautions. Some examples would be turning on the lights, not walking backwards down a hall and not blindly hiding in a space without checking whether said location was safe.
In this case, to avoid a needless death to the maws of a zombie, one should probably face the door. It's a simple concept. By facing the door you have at least a slight visual awareness of the singular point of entry into the room. By identifying the trespasser early, such as a parent, friend or mindless flesh-eating freak, you can adjust your reaction between annoyance, terror and frenzied aggression.
If for some reason or another you are partially blind and unable to see a door open, I recommend a simple alarm mechanism. These could range from chains dangling on the handle to a baby alarm monitor to a 220lb Rottweiler. It's really up to you.
#2) Have a plan of escape. Chances are, despite how many zombies you kill, more will come. They might not come one after another but don't fret they'll turn up either today or tomorrow or the day after that or the next year, you get my drift. Hence, you most likely want to get to somewhere safe. The safe haven of your choice is up to you but here are some of my personal favourites:
-The armory of your nearest army camp
-Turf City (That place is a fortress I tell you.)
-Somewhere underground, like MB-1
-Hell (Which is Tiong Bahru, a nice place filled with potential meat shields and tall buildings which can serve as temporary shelters.)
But before that, one should probably focus on getting out of the room first. In this scenario, one has three possible options. This is commonly known as the Fight Flight or Fright response.
First, Fight. In this case, one may or may not casually toss one's life aside in an attempt to break free of the entrapment. This is effective if you are properly armed and the opposition is not too numerous.
Second, Flight. Basically, it means you panzy out. Finding an escape route can be easy if you pick the proper place to study. Since most of us will not be studying in a room with nothing but 4 white walls and a door, we can leave out the certain death scenario. Instead, one should try to utilize various furnishings in the room such as windows, side doors, ventilation shafts and what not in order to escape effectively.
Third, Fright. This basically means good game for you. Being petrified and torn to shreds is rather painful, especially if you have to watch a zombie eat your colon right in front of you. While some might find this experience surreal and strangely fascinating, most normal individuals would rather not die. Hence, the Fright syndrome is not recommended. For tips on removing fear from the system, take 5 minutes to travel down the Internet's Pantheon of Badass Heroes.
#3) Have something on hand to defend yourself with. Hypothetically speaking, there may be an incident where you are locked in an epic life or death struggle with one of the undead. Whilst that should not happen as long as you maintain constant vigilance, shit happens and therefore one must also familiarize oneself with potential weapons in such cases. (Get cracking on that spear.)
- Highlighters. Disregard these, they're useless.
- Pens. Slightly more useful for jabbing through the eye socket and into the cranium.
- Weird mathematical equipment. I'm sure they hurt in the worst ways.
- The Chair you're sitting on. Good for flattening zombies with, use it liberally if there's enough space to wield one.
- Textbooks. If they're big and heavy chances are they pack a punch, utilize these freely.
- GDC. It might cost 75 bucks but that's 75 dollars worth of hard plastic and metal that can be used to cave in a zombie's brain.
- Subject notes. See Highlighters.
Of course there might be a myriad of other items available to you depending on the environment one is studying in. In my case, I would carry a paraffin lamp into my room. Firstly, it provides light to study with and secondly, in the event of a zombie attack, ill shatter the lamp and incinerate my humble abode. The fire-hazard I call a room will more than likely kill if not hold back many foes while I scramble off the roof-tops to sweet freedom.
#4) Communication. Never ever study in a room with poor reception. You want to be able to at least receive messages via the telephone-communication network or over the radio. This will give you the heads-up and the opportunity to avoid meeting a grizzly end. Keep in mind the entertainment value the radio provides also helps keep one sane in the wee hours of the morning trying to decipher what one wrote on that tiny scrap of A4 paper a year ago.
#5) Keep people nearby. Note that I specifically did not use the word friend since most would find it unethical for one to toss a friend into the blood embrace of a horde of zombies.
Having people around helps boost one's morale knowing that one is not suffering alone. Unless said company is busy enjoying a movie or reading a nice happy storybook, then one should not feel remorse about using said company as a meat shield.
Having knowledgeable company is also useful for studying. Like, duh.
This is all I have to update you guys on for now.
Till next time!
Zombloke II
Options G and H suckers
Stalwart Defender of the Golden Way
Mohican
Today I'll be revising my previous stance on mugging. No, I still refuse to believe that it does not cause zombification but then again, 500 tests on starving children have yet to prove me right. Fret not, my zeal is not quenched and if I have to process all of Singapore's youth than by the gods I shall.
Anyway, in accordance with MB-1 policy regarding 'a lack of things to write about', I shall now attempt to draft a new set of tips to help you would-be-zombi--, I mean students wholly devoted to the excellence of your end-year results.
Ok, as mentioned before the most likely place you could be studying in would be a room. A nice quant four-walled enclave in which you can mercilessly pour over pages and pages of text. If you're studying in the open, well, a whole different set of rules apply.
First off! Tips and tricks on how to stay alive in a zombie invasion while studying in an enclosed area.
#1) Always study facing the door. Most needless zombie deaths could usually be avoided as long as the character takes some simple precautions. Some examples would be turning on the lights, not walking backwards down a hall and not blindly hiding in a space without checking whether said location was safe.
In this case, to avoid a needless death to the maws of a zombie, one should probably face the door. It's a simple concept. By facing the door you have at least a slight visual awareness of the singular point of entry into the room. By identifying the trespasser early, such as a parent, friend or mindless flesh-eating freak, you can adjust your reaction between annoyance, terror and frenzied aggression.
If for some reason or another you are partially blind and unable to see a door open, I recommend a simple alarm mechanism. These could range from chains dangling on the handle to a baby alarm monitor to a 220lb Rottweiler. It's really up to you.
#2) Have a plan of escape. Chances are, despite how many zombies you kill, more will come. They might not come one after another but don't fret they'll turn up either today or tomorrow or the day after that or the next year, you get my drift. Hence, you most likely want to get to somewhere safe. The safe haven of your choice is up to you but here are some of my personal favourites:
-The armory of your nearest army camp
-Turf City (That place is a fortress I tell you.)
-Somewhere underground, like MB-1
-Hell (Which is Tiong Bahru, a nice place filled with potential meat shields and tall buildings which can serve as temporary shelters.)
But before that, one should probably focus on getting out of the room first. In this scenario, one has three possible options. This is commonly known as the Fight Flight or Fright response.
First, Fight. In this case, one may or may not casually toss one's life aside in an attempt to break free of the entrapment. This is effective if you are properly armed and the opposition is not too numerous.
Second, Flight. Basically, it means you panzy out. Finding an escape route can be easy if you pick the proper place to study. Since most of us will not be studying in a room with nothing but 4 white walls and a door, we can leave out the certain death scenario. Instead, one should try to utilize various furnishings in the room such as windows, side doors, ventilation shafts and what not in order to escape effectively.
Third, Fright. This basically means good game for you. Being petrified and torn to shreds is rather painful, especially if you have to watch a zombie eat your colon right in front of you. While some might find this experience surreal and strangely fascinating, most normal individuals would rather not die. Hence, the Fright syndrome is not recommended. For tips on removing fear from the system, take 5 minutes to travel down the Internet's Pantheon of Badass Heroes.
#3) Have something on hand to defend yourself with. Hypothetically speaking, there may be an incident where you are locked in an epic life or death struggle with one of the undead. Whilst that should not happen as long as you maintain constant vigilance, shit happens and therefore one must also familiarize oneself with potential weapons in such cases. (Get cracking on that spear.)
- Highlighters. Disregard these, they're useless.
- Pens. Slightly more useful for jabbing through the eye socket and into the cranium.
- Weird mathematical equipment. I'm sure they hurt in the worst ways.
- The Chair you're sitting on. Good for flattening zombies with, use it liberally if there's enough space to wield one.
- Textbooks. If they're big and heavy chances are they pack a punch, utilize these freely.
- GDC. It might cost 75 bucks but that's 75 dollars worth of hard plastic and metal that can be used to cave in a zombie's brain.
- Subject notes. See Highlighters.
Of course there might be a myriad of other items available to you depending on the environment one is studying in. In my case, I would carry a paraffin lamp into my room. Firstly, it provides light to study with and secondly, in the event of a zombie attack, ill shatter the lamp and incinerate my humble abode. The fire-hazard I call a room will more than likely kill if not hold back many foes while I scramble off the roof-tops to sweet freedom.
#4) Communication. Never ever study in a room with poor reception. You want to be able to at least receive messages via the telephone-communication network or over the radio. This will give you the heads-up and the opportunity to avoid meeting a grizzly end. Keep in mind the entertainment value the radio provides also helps keep one sane in the wee hours of the morning trying to decipher what one wrote on that tiny scrap of A4 paper a year ago.
#5) Keep people nearby. Note that I specifically did not use the word friend since most would find it unethical for one to toss a friend into the blood embrace of a horde of zombies.
Having people around helps boost one's morale knowing that one is not suffering alone. Unless said company is busy enjoying a movie or reading a nice happy storybook, then one should not feel remorse about using said company as a meat shield.
Having knowledgeable company is also useful for studying. Like, duh.
This is all I have to update you guys on for now.
Till next time!
Zombloke II
Options G and H suckers
Stalwart Defender of the Golden Way
Mohican
Diary of a PARANOID MAN V
Greetings.
This second successive post will be about more light-hearted matters.
Sometimes, communication over the internet makes it difficult to believe that some people aren't really actually zombies, or so my experiences recently have shown me.
Example 1
10:05:21 PM M : hat do we hacve rto study for organicv cherm
10:05:42 PM Y: WTF DID YOU JUST SAY
Example 2
9:48:44 PM MEELSA : hahahahahaha
9:49:01 PM MEELSA : oh mannn
9:49:10 PM MEELSA : we should like
9:49:15 PM MEELSA : get him to press his hands into a block of wet cemen
9:49:17 PM MEELSA : cement*
9:49:21 PM MEELSA : dear god. what an awful typo.
Example 3
(So far, i have felt a certain need to censor the names of people involved, but not for this one.)
Clorets Junkie says:
sweety
Clorets Junkie says:
sweet*
Clorets Junkie says:
wtf
Yes. Bloke called me 'sweety'. Sometimes i wonder if the knowledge of the inevitability of zombie invasions weigh down upon his mind too heavily.
End.
This second successive post will be about more light-hearted matters.
Sometimes, communication over the internet makes it difficult to believe that some people aren't really actually zombies, or so my experiences recently have shown me.
Example 1
10:05:21 PM M : hat do we hacve rto study for organicv cherm
10:05:42 PM Y: WTF DID YOU JUST SAY
Example 2
9:48:44 PM MEELSA : hahahahahaha
9:49:01 PM MEELSA : oh mannn
9:49:10 PM MEELSA : we should like
9:49:15 PM MEELSA : get him to press his hands into a block of wet cemen
9:49:17 PM MEELSA : cement*
9:49:21 PM MEELSA : dear god. what an awful typo.
Example 3
(So far, i have felt a certain need to censor the names of people involved, but not for this one.)
Clorets Junkie says:
sweety
Clorets Junkie says:
sweet*
Clorets Junkie says:
wtf
Yes. Bloke called me 'sweety'. Sometimes i wonder if the knowledge of the inevitability of zombie invasions weigh down upon his mind too heavily.
End.
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