Sunday, September 9, 2007

On-topic Once Again. Household Weapons

Greetings from the zombloke team.


Apologies are sent out for the recent spate of random posts, including, exams, Zombloke II's passionate post on mugging, and Zombloke III's passionate post on purging.


We are now back on-topic with the idea of dealing with and preparing for zombie invasions.


This post covers the use of a household item as an extremely effective weapon against zombies, especially the ones that tend to sneak up on you and engage in close combat.


"The undead can be stopped by removing the head or destroying the brain."

-Newscaster from Shaun of the Dead



Yes, removing the head or destroying the brain. Common knowledge, and this has to be put to good use.



Thus, anything sufficiently heavy, or sharp enough, to create an indent on the human cranium, one of the toughest bones in the body, will be good enough. This post covers the use of the dumbbell.



This is a picture of an average dumbbell. In the right hands, it can turn into a flurry of destruction.

Firstly, the average dumbbell is heavy enough to put a strain on the person who regularly uses it, but not too heavy such that that it limits the movement of that person.

Secondly, the combination of two factors, namely, the weight of the dumbbell, and the useful dangerous-looking screws sticking out for the purpose of adding more weights, create an awesome weapon. An overhead swing, making use of the potential energy that is enhanced by its weight, could easily turn someone, or somezombie's head into mush.

At the Zombloke HQ, we carried out several tests of which I will display no pictures due to the nature of this destructive weapon. The force of the blow was calculated to be an average of 4,441 pounds.

Conclusively, the dumbbell is a useful converted weapon that should be salvaged during a zombie invasion.

Signed,

Zombloke

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